Personal Space for Children

I have come to realise that Jiale needs his personal space from Didi. It's not realistic to expect him to share all his things and always play together with Didi. This is especially so since Didi is still at the destructive age and does not know how to be gentle with 'fragile' items, such as Jiale's 3D foam letters and the trains which he spends much effort to line up soooo precisely. Not to mention that Didi does not understand &/or does not care what is 'NO!!'

Thus the playyard has come in handy again. Other than cordoning off the sofa & coffee table so that Didi cannot climb on them, the area has also become Jiale's space away from Didi. Jiale can easily climb over the playyard, while Didi can only look on.

Other than this small area in the living room, I also tell Jiale that if he does not want Didi to touch his things or to disturb him, he should go into his bedroom and close the door. So far, this arrangment has been working quite well. But as you can see, Didi has started his attempts to climb over the playyard, probably because he sees Kor Kor do it so often. Hopefully, by the time he manages to climb over, he will be able to understand the idea of 'personal space' without needing a physical barrier.

Other than me, the other person with whom the boys spend the most time would be each other. Notwithstanding that Jiale only goes to school for one morning a week, I believe that the time spent in school or at other caregivers' place cannot really be counted as personal space, as the child would not be in his own home. And even though Jiale gets a break from Didi when Didi is having his morning nap, I would consider that more to be personal time, rather than personal space. My idea of personal space is a place where the child can retreat to anytime, depending on his mood & preferences.

That said, it does not mean that the brothers don't get along. Often, I walk past the living room to see them on different sides of the playyard, and the next time I walk past, both boys would be playing together somewhere. It makes me feel good to know that Jiale made the choice to be with his brother : )