Yep, Singaporeans are complaining again. I really buay tahan!!
Firstly, there is probably going to be nothing at all in the new package that will benefit me - I am a SAHM so no need for maternity leave anymore, no intention to send my kids to preschool, no need for the HDB priority cos we have no plans to move (I think I don't wanna move until my kids are old enough to pack their own stuff!!), paternity leave has not much impact on us cos Hubby does have quite a lot of leave (need to clear!!) and he doesn't take long stretches of leave cos we don't have overseas vacation. Oh, we will benefit from the new Medisave for newborns, just like everyone else : )
Truth to be told, as I was listening to PM Lee, of course I was hoping that there would be something for SAHMs.. but well, nothing. And frankly, I think the government would be nuts to offer incentives for women to become SAHMs! We already need more human beings in the workforce.. how to let go of women who need incentives to become SAHMs?? If indeed more and more women are already willing to become SAHMs without external incentives, I am sure that is already a headache for the government.. good enough that we are not penalized ok. If you remember about positive/negative reinforcement/punishment, the lack of a reward is not a punishment. So, it is definitely not right to say oh since working mothers get more subsidies, it's punishing SAHMs... no no no. If encourage women to become SAHMs + give long maternity leave (16 weeks is already long ok) + give paternity leave... WHO work????
I am fortunate that my hubby is able to support our family of four and I don't die die have to work. But seriously, how many of the people around me who are complaining are those who die die need dual incomes to survive?? Or just need dual incomes to sustain a comfortable lifestyle which they are used to and are not willing to sacrifice for the sake of their children? I am not saying that it is wrong to be a working mother, I am saying it's a choice. It's a personal choice, it's a family choice, it's a lifestyle choice. If after considering all aspects and one/both spouse(s) are not willing to become a single-income family, cannot blame the government right?
Preschools. Haha. There are now 247 PCF kindergartens. BUT so many people choose to enrol their children in more expensive and atas preschools. Whose fault? Whose problem? Yes, yes, some might say the quality is different. So, you choose quality, you pay lor. (This is just like the housing problem.) No money? Then give up the overseas trips, give up enrichment lessons, give up branded clothes & bags & makeup & car & condominium. Tata! Got money liao!
I also like very much the decision not to nationalise preschools. Because people just wanna enrol at atas schools without paying atas fees. But then, the whole world also want that mah. Then not enough places.. then how? Instead, the government will be bringing in new AOPs (Anchor Operators, ie PCF & NTUC) and upgrading existing AOPs. Yes! More non-atas kindergartens! DO NOT DO NOT DO NOT give in to not-poor parents who only want atas preschools and not willing to pay! Worried about social mobility? Worried about disadvantaged lower-income families? Government will take care of them!
Actually, the abovementioned is just referring to people around me, i.e. definitely not poor people. Not rich maybe, but not poor not poor not poor. So I am very glad that the proposed increased financial support is targeted toward low- and middle-income groups. That's the way to go! Must help those who are really poor and who can't even afford PCF kindergartens even though they are happy to enrol their children there. Ignore those who have money but still want to complain.
[Sidetrack: My 33-month-old son is attending one morning (3 hours) of preschool a week. It is an atas and expensive preschool. One month (i.e. 4 lessons) costs about $300. If we want to enrol him there for daily lessons, it will be a crazy $1500 per month. Since we can't afford it/don't want to spend this kind of money, if/when we do want to send him for daily classes, we will enrol him at PCF instead. A kindergarten which we can afford. It is probably not as good as his current school, it definitely doesn't meet all my criteria for a good school, but it's our choice after considering our limitations. No complaints.]
Money aside, PM has made it clear that there is no need to drill young children (poor kids) academically in preschools. Loud and clear. But will parents listen? Nope. They will just complain they have no choice because the local education system is so competitive and academic-based. I agree, it's competitive and academic-based. To me, that is exactly why there is no need to worry so much during preschool. Because our education system is so effective that the kids will learn what they need to learn for P1 during P1! The parents are the ones spoiling the market and making life difficult for teachers, other parents and policy-makers. Kiasu, and then complain it's other people's fault.
We cannot control the larger system - unless you are willing to be a social activist &/or advocate. But, are you willing to make the sacrifices to do so? No? So you just wanna complain? Let's just do what an individual can control - make a difference with your own children, drop out of the rat race. We have to start somewhere, instead of waiting for some other people/things to change first.
Hmmm actually i don't quite know what benefits gov can offer SAHM or WAHMs but what I do know is this - that SAHMs would appreciate being acknowledged for the decision they have made, and in this society, we do get a bit of flak and quite senseless comments like we are 'tai tai's. what people do not realise is that often sacrifices are made so that a family goes from dual to single income, regardless of how much that single income may be.
ReplyDelete"If indeed more and more women are already willing to become SAHMs without external incentives, I am sure that is already a headache for the government.. good enough that we are not penalized ok."
I'm not quite sure what you mean by SAHMs causing a headache for the gov, and that SAHMs should be thankful that we are "not penalised".
For me, I think that to take moms away from their ability to spend time nurturing their own children would be a far greater concern for gov in terms of social costs e.g. neglected children = increased tendency of delinquency, or parents overcompensating for their absence through expensive gifts = brats.
The society of 'difficult' parents today are to a large degree a successful product of our previous policies in social engineering and education. It would take time for the society of adults who have been conditioned to think of everything in terms of material value ( perpetuated too by our gov's constant emphasis on GDP, reserves and all monetary/financial quantifiers) to change their mindset.
But I applaud the gov for at least trying to set the direction for change. The use of very philosophical, almost romantic even, terms such as writing our national story about Our Singapore - our home and heart, signals something different from previous years.
And I think that parents like you and others who have chosen to buck the norm, leave promising careers to raise a family, is also very promising.
We cannot control the larger system; but we can influence. And we don't really need to be social activist or high-profile advocates. We start with doing what we believe in.
And you know what? People say complaining doesn't get anyone anywhere... but sadly, it seems that since the last election, the complaints that have built up into rather vitriolic sentiments online seem to have had an impact on our leaders leh.
Urmm.. who "take moms away from their ability to spend time nurturing their own children"?
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